Is that a ciggarette in the bottom of your vodka and soda…

They say if you hold your ear to a conk shell you can hear the ocean. Well if you hold your ear to my belly button you will hear ” hey what are you doing listening to my belly button you freak” . Then I will leave.

I don’t really drink any more, it sucks. All of my friends still drink, so eventually you realize how stupid every one is while they’re inebriated. When people find out you don’t drink you’ve automatically become the DD. Driving people home trying to convince them that its not really polite to flip every one else off at the stop light.

I end up sitting in a bar fascinated by the poor lighting and how it smells like stale beer. I wont dance of course because I’m missing that thing that alcohol use to bring, that false confidence sponsored by dollar draft night. All I’m trying to say people is that if you drink don’t quit. Life will loose all its color, and you get this misguided feeling of superiority until you remember that one time you peed in a movie theater.

JU